I think that would have to be my family. Blood and non-blood. Non-blood meaning the collected people that were friends, and grew to be more. My family literally sends me in to panic/anxiety attacks every time I am around them. It used to be so bad that I could hardly stand them. I really didn't understand WHY I couldn't stand them, and neither did they. I now understand why. It's because I can't breathe. haha. It's been a really really long road, and I am trying really hard not to react the way I do to them. It's just something about the drama I can't handle. I am not sure if I make it out to be worse than it really is, or it really is just twisted stuff happening.
Since being in Nor cal, I have really cleaned out a lot of the hatred I have had for my family in my heart, and I have really begun to love them for who they are. What they do. Where they are in life. I try to communicate with my mom more, my sisters, and other friends I have had. I think I really needed space to clean out the junk before I could begin talking to them again, and really showing them that I love them.
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