I can't say no.

This is one of those posts that may or may not have any pretty pictures or even make sense. I am just sitting here at midnight having a mental/ emotional break down. My head hurts. I feel like crying. My whole body is aching. I am tired, but I can't sleep.

I just got out of the ER yesterday due to this horrible infection I am fighting. I was throwing up everything for two days, and I literally felt like I was dying. That may be dramatic, but I am a wuss. I don't care who knows it. I felt like I was being sucked dry of everything in my body. They ran the IV juice through me, and gave me meds that made me feel a little better. I felt like that gave me license to do everything I normally do today, and I feel so stupid for thinking that. I don't know why I decided to do all the chores today, take care of business stuff, and grocery shop. 

I keep forgetting that I am pregnant. As in, I can't always just be running around. As in, "Hey I have an idea! Maybe you should chill out the day after you get out of the ER."

There were so many problems with the business today, and yes, it may be unprofessional to talk about it on my blog, but I am frustrated beyond belief. Two situations that were all because of USPS, and two situations that I had to do major damage control with. One of the problems I haven't even actually figured out how to deal with yet, and I just want to cry!

Is it wrong to just want to say to a customer,
"I am pregnant. I just got out of the ER yesterday. USPS lost your package, and I was not smart enough to get a tracking number. Can I just send you a new one?"

I just need a break... I am thankful my husband finally got the hint tonight that I needed help. I am honestly just about burst with all the thoughts, responsibilities, and daily problems I solve on my own. Whine whine whine.. I know..

I never like to ask for help. I am also a people pleaser, and I can't help but feel like my back is breaking from bending my back way too far for everything in my life right now.

I just don't know how to tell people, "I just cant do this right now because the stress is causing me to almost hyperventilate." or just say plain, no...


This is my moody post for the week, or day. I'm not sure.